Games

You are in Walmart staring at the virtual aquariums on all of the flat screen televisions. All of a sudden, you feel someone breathing on your neck. For some odd reason, you smell cinnamon rolls. You’re not quite sure how you got into this situation but you remember partying with Jonah Hill the night before. Then, out of nowhere, Jackie Chan sprints by you and all of a sudden, The Rock is on his way towards you. As he’s running by, he scoops you up with one hand and carries you toward Jackie Chan. The Rock asks, “Do I look nice today?”

You’re a little creeped out so you dive into the passing black hole on your right. Ah, finally. A nice quiet room with a huge, comfortable couch to relax in. But all of sudden, you feel the room start to shake. You look up and realize this was just a fake room on the shoulder of Optimus Prime. You’re terrified, but at the same time you enjoy the view from Optimus Prime’s shoulders. 

You’re quite content but have a feeling things might take a turn for the worst. You look around for more options and realize you have a parachute on your back.

You see David Hasselhoff giving Spongebob and Patrick a ride to bikini bottom. You jump down and just get a hold of Hasselhoff’s foot.

Or

You see a nearby time machine, jump down and enter the time machine. 

You jump and all of a sudden are flying through the air. Then, you realize you’re in a car. But wait a second, it’s a hover car. You look to your left and see it’s a raccoon driving. You’re nervous about this, so you decide it’s time to leave and go back home.

But as you try to open the door, the raccoon swerves into a building and the car plummets to the ground. For some reason, things smell fishy and you see a penguin waving for you to come over. You’re quite confused by this, so you look around for more options…

You approach the penguin but as you do, the penguin asks, “Do I look nice today?”

You say, “Of course you do, you’re a penguin.”

Or

You slap the penguin in the face and run away.

You pick the third option, none of the above, and run for your life. As you’re running you see a cheetah running beside you and you are found asking yourself, “How am I running 58 mph?” But you just shrug, hop on the cheetahs back and ride off. 

All of a sudden, the cheetah transforms into the Batmobile and the Joker is close behind in his eighteen wheeler. The car smells like Christmas trees and you’re just left wondering how Christian Bale fights crime with such a gorgeous, nice smelling car. This quick moment of disarray passes and you hear the Joker fire his bazooka. You see the missile approaching and you simply accept your fate, put your feet on the dashboard and open up that ice cold drink.